Hmmm… I wonder what this will be about?

You know, I’ve been using multiple devices lately and my password is only saved on one of them at a time. Because I’m retarded, I often use a pretty obscure browser that doesn’t actually have a working password manager, never mind the ability to sync them with anything.

So, to login, I pretty much reset my password every time I change browser. By the time I figure that out, I have forgotten what I was going too type. I don’t think I can fool you into believing I do this sober.

That’s the state of affairs here, currently. Doesn’t look likely to improve any time soon.

With that in mind, you’re free to continue…

I had company today, as was expected. Remember how I told you the drummer had work to do and that he’d eventually need to stop by. Well, he was here to rehearse this weekend and here today, as expected. It’s snowing today, which amuses me. He had to drive in it.

And, of course, we talked about new contracts. That’s what I was going to talk about, but let’s take a quick side trek.

Before we get to that, one of the things that pleases me most is that now the entire band will continue making their entire income from their musicianship.

I’ve been pretty careful using that phrase, it’s a bit more complicated. Some of them have been augmenting their income by teaching. None of them have a lot of students, I believe the most is just two. But, it means the torch is being passed.

This pleases me. I shouldn’t need to tell you why.

Now, back to the subject at hand!

We have a new idea! It’s instructive and beneficial. It begins with this (not verbatim):

Drummer: I need to like feed my kids and my wife is really mad at me.
Me: That’s why you make the big bucks!
Drummer: No. I need to make more because … (Drones on while I pointedly ignore him.)
Me: You need to bring more to the table if you want to earn more in the new contracts.
Drummer: (Droning, something about ramen, blah blah, something about rent.)
Me: I have it!

The person(s) that get us an acceptable performance will get a bonus. That is, it must meet our minimal standards, including compensation and general agreeability (That’s definitely a word, spell check. I will it to be so!) within the band.

In return, I am not agreeing to personally perform at those venues. If they decide, for example, to take a wedding reception that meets our minimal standards, they can do that. I ain’t playing. I do not do weddings.

I doubt they’re going to find many weddings that pay our appearance fees. But, there you have it. And this goes for other venues. The more performing they do, the more money they make.

This will give them some more freedom and some more education and experience. This will incentivize them to take charge and put our name out there. Hopefully it’ll prompt them to make new promo material!

And, yes… Yes, I’m kinda pushing us into the meat grinder. Yes, it’s what they need to do.

However, they have one saving grace. Our bill is pretty high. Not too many shitty venues are going to be willing to pay that. The bill doesn’t go down because we need the money. We can eat slightly better than ramen without the extra.

I’d like them to make a modest middle-income salary that will be reliable and regular income. And, I’ve been through the meat grinder. I’ve got my scars and chops. I don’t need to prove anything. And, in addition, I’ll let them keep splitting my salary when I do not perform.

That was a plan that was concocted while I was day-drinking and I’d eaten some opiates, but it seems like a pretty good idea. I’m sure I’ll be at every performance, just to observe. It’ll actually result in me being even busier, but I already obligated myself to this.

It means there’s likely to be a whole lot of missed Friday nights. I’m not going to be able to be as selective as I’d like to be. I’m also not always going to be the person totally responsible for that selection. The band outnumber me and have earned their right to have a say in their determination.

I see this as a very positive thing, but I am not sober. This is absolutely not in any contract language, at this time. What do you folks think? I can’t see this backfiring in a way that negatively impacts me! I can just say I ain’t playing!

Frankly, it’s a much better grind than what they were doing. They will make a full two orders of magnitude greater income than they made when we met.

If I don’t perform enough, I might have time to pick up another act and see if I can shop them seasonally around the eastern part of Maine! (I kid. That’s not on my list of shit to do.)

Hmm… I could have like a minor league of musicians and a major league and become a “live act kingpin,” using tyranny, bribery, corruption, and violence to extract maximum revenue from the venues.

I could be like the live act union boss! I’d be a music tycoon!

Best day ever!

Alright, this is silly and short. I’m really curious about what you think of this idea. Either leave a comment, or you know where to find me. Until next time…

Shut up and play us a song!

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